Liner Notes
People, by nature, like to have names for things. Without words we have a lot of trouble conceptualizing and understanding our circumstances. There's a power inherent in putting a name to something, for this record my aim was to put names to some universal experiences. This is the very basic philosophy, I'm not trying to say I invented these ideas, just that they were rolling around in my head while I was making this record. Words are powerful tools, language is the most effective symbol we have. Speaking of words, I also think the best way to understand a word is to look at the etymology, the history of how it's been used. The word "haunt" didn’t start as a ghastly, spooky thing. A haunt, traditionally, is a place you return to, a haunting is a homecoming. To name your ghosts means you are naming the things that return to you, the memories that never seem to let you go, that call you home whether you want them or not. We have the power to name them, to say, "I see you. I know you. I made you. I am you. And while you are a part of me, you are not in charge of me." By putting words and songs to the ideas on this album, it's been my way of grappling with them and learning how to live with them. If it helps you, or if it just keeps you entertained for 40 minutes, I'll have done my job and I will be happy.
Ava Simone
Credits
Produced by Ava Simone
Lead vocals, background vocals, acoustic guitar, electric guitar, bass, ukulele, piano, keys, melodica, percussion: Ava Simone
Mixing: Ava Simone Assistant mixing: Paige Rooney Mastering: Ava Simone Creative consultation: Rocky LeRoe, Hugh Barrett, Paige Rooney Album art photographer: Anna Strelec Album art editor: Jackie Barrett
All songs composed and arranged by Ava Simone
All lyrics by Ava Simone
Special Thanks
To Paige, for the mac and cheese, Golden Girls marathons, and prayers. To Millie, for making me laugh more than anyone and encouraging me like no other. To Anna, for perpetually tolerating me. To Brandon, for all the coffee, all the co-working, and inspiring one hell of a song. To Mackie, for naming my bass. To The Barrett Clan, for the well-within-reason cheerleading and giving me a soft place to land. To The Chruchiel Group, for the never-within-reason but always-necessary cheerleading. To everyone who gave me grace, lent me an ear, let me play guitar at you, I couldn't have made this record without all your help. Thank you.
Naming My Ghosts Lyrics
"Destroyed For You"
Ava Simone
[Verse 1]
I can't stand being someone you wouldn't talk about
I don't care how you address me, be it a whisper or a shout
Use your heart use your voice just call me somehow
I put my heart in your hands and watched you place it down
[Verse 2]
This gravity pulls me back so how could I oppose
I can't make sense of the heart and the hurt I've come to know
Holding on to barbed wire and I'm not letting go
Was I a sign from God that you're better off alone
[CHORUS]
I'm throwing a white flag
My artillery is buried where you said
If you want I'll draw a map to it
You can watch me be destroyed for you again
[Verse 3]
Front lines don't just disappear they linger long like dreams
The line keeps on moving up when you pull back from me
If this is how it ends I'll just ask for one thing
You can let me drown but please don't make me bleed
[CHORUS]
I'm throwing a white flag
My artillery is buried where you said
If you want I'll draw a map to it
You can watch me be destroyed for you again
[Bridge]
And the hardest part
Is loving you through it all
Knowing it will be here tomorrow when you are gone
When you are gone
[CHORUS]
I'm throwing a white flag
My artillery is buried where you said
If you want I'll draw a map to it
You can watch me be destroyed for you
You can watch me be destroyed for you
Watch me be destroyed for you again
"Magnolia"
Ava Simone
[Verse 1]
His shirt on my bedroom floor
His hands somewhere they haven't been before
Twin flame who didn't keep his distance
I prayed that he's what's been missing
[Pre-chorus]
I wake up in the morning
And I don't see what's coming
[CHORUS]
Magnolia
What are you running from
Thought that I found surrender in your strength
And I just guess I hoped you would have stayed
[Verse 2]
I thought his name felt like a hymn
But now I get sad just thinking of it
He stayed right where he was born
Maybe that's why he has to roam
[Pre-chorus]
I wake up in the morning
And I don't see what's coming
[CHORUS]
Magnolia
What are you running from
Thought that I found surrender in your strength
And I just guess I hoped you would have stayed
[Bridge]
Magnolia, my sweet evergreen boy
Magnolia, please won't you tell me why
[CHORUS]
Magnolia
What are you running from
Thought that I found surrender in your strength
And I just guess I hoped you would have stayed
"Behind Her Hair"
Ava Simone
[Verse 1]
I still wear the bracelet that she gave me
I still read the letters that she wrote
I still sing the songs that are about her
And somehow she is still in every note
[Verse 2]
Her sweater still hangs inside my closet
I take it out when I can't go to sleep
And it's been years since the day it was all over
But something about her haunts my wayward dreams
[CHORUS]
I can't give up the ghost though I've tried to
In my soul she still feels like a prayer
Really I just miss the taste of her lips
And the tattoo that she hid behind her hair
[Verse 3]
Most days she lives behind my eyelids
And in the face of every woman that I see
Who knew that something deeper than the ocean
Doesn't make a scar when it leaves
[CHORUS]
I can't give up the ghost though I've tried to
In my soul she still feels like a prayer
Really I just miss the taste of her lips
And the tattoo that she hid behind her hair
[CHORUS]
I can't give up the ghost though I've tried to
In my soul she still feels like a prayer
Really I just miss the taste of her lips
And the tattoo that she hid behind her hair
"When the Sun Goes"
Ava Simone
[Verse 1]
With the universe expanding
And the sea levels rising
And oligarchs pretending they don't know a thing
On top of all that
Both the good and the bad
My baby's gone, I'm alone again
[CHORUS]
I know, I know, I know
When the sun goes I'll be alone again
Falling back into the darkness around me
A welcome to whoever reaches me first
[Verse 2]
Every day is the same
Wake up warmed by my own flame
The Molotov cocktail of our times
Wages frozen in place
Ice caps melting away
And the comfort of knowing it'll be over soon
[CHORUS]
I know, I know, I know
When the sun goes I'll be alone again
Falling back into the darkness around me
A welcome to whoever reaches me first
Ooh, ooh
[CHORUS]
I know, I know, I know
When the sun goes I'll be alone again
Falling back into the darkness around me
A welcome to whoever reaches me first
[CHORUS]
I know, I know, I know
When the sun goes I'll be alone again
Falling back into the darkness around me
A welcome to whoever reaches me first
[CHORUS]
I know, I know, I know
When the sun goes I'll be alone again
Falling back into the darkness around me
A welcome to whoever reaches me first
"Apparently Alive"
Ava Simone
[Verse 1]
There's a building on the corner that hasn't been open for a year
But the plants inside are growing like they don't care that you aren't here
The pavement where we used to walk is still intact like nothing's changed
Cracked and broken it still functions and I wish I could take its place
[CHORUS]
People walk around like they don't know this is a ghost town
Your translucent skin is burned into my mind
I'm haunted and hollow and apparently alive
[Verse 2]
Every day's a broken record of the ones that came before
Maybe next time that I leave I'll care enough to slam the door
When I hear people say it gets better I think they must not know how bad it hurts
Between the anger and the apathy I can't tell which is worse
[CHORUS]
People walk around like they don't know this is a ghost town
Your translucent skin is burned into my mind
I'm haunted and hollow and apparently alive
[Bridge]
Next time maybe you won't see right through me
Next time maybe I
Next time maybe you won't see right through me
Next time maybe I'll survive
[CHORUS]
People walk around like they don't know this is a ghost town
Your translucent skin is burned into my mind
I'm haunted and hollow and apparently alive
"Between"
Ava Simone
[Verse 1]
What lies between the sea and sky
Voice of angels, days gone by
Is all the world held in that seam
That place between the sky and sea
[Verse 2]
Will I think of you when I am there
Somewhere beyond the hidden veil
What joy it is to dream and be
In between the sky and sea
[Verse 3]
Though it's true there may be nothing
I cannot stop my thoughts, they ring
Out such beauty that I cry
And dream between the sea and sky
[Verse 4]
Here I stand before you I weep
You are between the sky and sea
When I'm to die, please let me die
Lay me between the sea and sky
When I'm to die, please let me die
Lay me between the sea and sky
"Troubadour Song"
Ava Simone
[Verse 1]
Side streets near the coastline
Running to nowhere
Jump into the water
And salt gets in my hair
[Verse 2]
Sunburns on my shoulders
Diamonds on the sea
Crosses by the roadside
Could one of those be me
[Pre-chorus]
Because I dance in rain so I don't feel
The broken parts that should have healed
[CHORUS]
If all my days are numbered, I'd go knowing I tried
And sing myself to somewhere and onward still towards life
And onwards still towards life.
[Verse 3]
Wind blows off the ocean
Sun shines on my face
If I could live forever
I'd leave without a trace
[Pre-chorus]
Instead I dance in rain 'til I can't feel
The broken parts that should have healed
[CHORUS]
If all my days are numbered, I'd go knowing I tried
And sing myself to somewhere and onward still towards life
And onwards still towards life.
[CHORUS]
If all my days are numbered, I'd go knowing I tried
And sing myself to somewhere and onward still towards life
And onwards still towards life.
"Into the Sky"
Ava Simone
[Verse 1]
His clothes smell like my favorite candle
Soft amber a hint of cashmere
He has California in his perfect smile
Ocean-eyed, always tired
[Verse 2]
The ghost of old love hides in his words
But he still calls me darling
His language is sweeter than songbirds
They just hope they're overheard
[CHORUS]
I would write him into the sky
Until he doesn’t want to hide
I will write him into the sky
So he knows what it is to fly
[Verse 3]
He could drown me with just a kiss
And I would break the wave
He doesn't even have to ask
Baby, I would die in this
[CHORUS]
I would send him into the sky
He's too good to be just mine
I will send him into the sky
Until he doesn't want to hide
[CHORUS]
I would send him into the sky
So he'd know what it is to fly
I would write him into the sky
He's too good to be just mine